Category: blog

An amused reader sent me an e-mail about a conservative blogger who took issue with a recent Candorville strip (and, though he didn’t mention it, he probably wasn’t too happy with the previous day either). From Town Hall:

The liberals hate Fox News with a passion because it is fast proving that Americans prefer not to be lied to [*ironic-licious link added -D. Bell*]. Fox brings both sides of political issues and probably have more liberal commentators on staff than do most other news services. Thus, they do not bring us only the liberal side. The liberals just can’t stand that and try to trivialize them as often as they can. More evidence that politics should be kept out of comics is “Candorville’s” Dec. 7 comic strip, which attempts to trivialize Fox News because it has many “foxes” on its staff who wear short skirts and show much cleavage, and they think that’s the reason why Fox is “whipping up on” all the other Cable stations and networks. As if all of them don’t have many foxes with short skirts and cleavage. Does this artist (and other liberals) really think we are so ignorant as to not be aware of this? Notice they also refer to it with three xes, as if the whole network is “triple-x.” Subtle. Too bad. When he stays away from politics, I actually enjoy this strip. (Candorville, 12/7/07)

All I have to say to that is…

Oh, and this…

Oh yeah, there’s also this…

(I probably should’ve warned you I was posting clips from Foxxx, they could probably get you fired if you watched them at work. Seriously.)

Yes, I’m sure just like Lemont, all those people who somehow think we found WMD in Iraq watch Fox News for the accuracy of their reporting. I don’t know how I and “the liberals” could have been so wrong.

In fact, that’s enough blogging, I have some accuracy to go watch…

It takes a certain kind of person to read today’s Candorville strip and conclude I’m joking about rape. It takes the kind of person who can read Candorville for any length of time and still conclude that its author would find something like rape funny. It takes the kind of person who thinks the words “rape” and “pillage” are interchangeable (if they were, the usual phrase describing the horrors of war wouldn’t be “rape AND pillage”).It takes this kind of person:

Hey.Funny strip most the time. Racial commentary and all that.But todays strip (12-20-07) appalled me. Unless I am reading that wrong, it seems to be a blatant and casual reference to rape. Who calls that humor? Rape is not something that should be include in anything labeled as “comic”.I’m sure you are aware of racist issues. Try to be aware of sexist issues. They are not that far apart.JW

I can’t believe anyone who’s read Candorville for any length of time would even entertain the notion that its author would find rape funny. If any other readers out there jumped to that same outlandishly offensive conclusion, please don’t bother me with it. I spend hours each week going back and forth with irate or confused readers about the topics I raise in Candorville, and I do it gladly. I love that part of this job. But this misinterpretation is just way too insulting to comment on any further.

Visit Candorville!

According to Mike Huckabee, his recent surge in the polls is due to divine intervention. But now we know Huckabee himself is divine, because the bookcase dressed to look like a cross floats right behind his head. I guess they thought stringing christmas lights around his forehead as if they were a crown of thorns would’ve been a little over the top.

Selling books directly from my website (instead of just linking you all to Amazon.com) has its benefits. I get to deface them with sketches, for one thing, and I get a kick out of seeing my boxes of books steadily become empty. The downside, however, is a lack of reader reviews on Amazon.com. This one below is great, but it’s awfully lonely. If you’ve read the second Candorville book, “Another Stereotype Bites the Dust,” don’t be afraid to review it on Amazon and let others know what you think.

Another Stereotype Bites the Dust is the second collection of Candorville comic strips by award-winning cartoonist Darrin Bell. Set in the inner city, Another Stereotype Bites the Dust follows the educated yet underachieving African-American writer Lemont Brown and his friends, an assertive Mexican-American woman and a mooching, rapper who still lives with his mother. The Candorville strip does not shy from edgy dialogue or equal jabs at modern social problems, governmental failings, and excessive political correctness. In one strip, Lemont Brown tries to vote and is told “Well that explains why you haven’t received your absentee ballot, Mr. Brawn. You’re on the felon list. Felons aren’t allowed to vote in Candorville.” “Brown! Not Brawn! Brown!” “Thank you for turning yourself in, Mr. Brawn.” A wickedly funny, “must-read” humor book showcasing the talent, insight, and biting criticisms of a rising star among cartoonists.

All that said, I’ve just sold out of my stock of books and a new batch won’t arrive until the new year, but you can still order copies of both “Thank God for Culture Clash” and “Another Stereotype Bites the Dust” in time for Xmas at Amazon.

Sometimes revelations that the President’s been lying about WMD again and “can’t recall” hearing about the CIA’s torture-tape coverup make you want to write out a long, detailed, link-filled post. Other times, it can make you want to tune out and watch Steve Martin:

Several weeks ago, Candorville commented on the amusing phenomenon of gay-hating Republican politicians who turn out to be gay themselves. In response to this hairy issue, some hardcore conservatives shot off no less than two dozen e-mails assuring me I had it all wrong. Looks like they’re right: not all gay-haters are secretly scouring airport men’s rooms looking for a good time.Some of them are sitting at home in the dark, frantically researching their gayness on Conservapedia.

(As of this writing, every single one of the most-viewed pages has something to do with homosexuality, from an alleged increased risk of disease to gayness in Scottland).

Now this is why I think they should teach about homosexual behavior in Health class, so the Larry Craig’s of the country wouldn’t have to rely on shady, agenda-driven websites when they’re worried about catching hepatitis.

As Resident Bush continues to tell us the economy couldn’t possibly, in any way, be better, and that in fact American money will henceforth fly out of our ATMs accompanied by flowers and candy, here’s further evidence that he’s right. The Bush economy is doing very well. Foreigners love it!

From Bloomberg

Nov. 27 (Bloomberg) — Citigroup Inc., the biggest U.S. bank by assets, will receive a $7.5 billion cash infusion from Abu Dhabi to replenish capital after record mortgage losses wiped out almost half its market value.

Citigroup rose 2.6 percent in New York trading today following acting Chief Executive Officer Win Bischoff’s statement late yesterday that funds from the state-owned Abu Dhabi Investment Authority will help “strengthen our capital base.”

Abu Dhabi will buy securities that convert to stock and yield 11 percent a year, almost double the interest Citigroup offers bond investors, underscoring the New York-based company’s need for cash. Fourth-quarter profit will be reduced by as much as $7 billion because of losses from subprime mortgages, which led to the departure of CEO Charles O. “Chuck” Prince III and a 46 percent slump in its stock this year.

“Clearly, Citi has a problem with capital adequacy after the subprime crisis,” said Giyas Gokkent, head of research at National Bank of Abu Dhabi PJSC, Abu Dhabi’s biggest bank by market value. “ADIA has seen an opportunity to get cheaply into a blue-chip stock.”

With the purchase of a 4.9 percent stake, Abu Dhabi, the largest emirate in the United Arab Emirates and its capital, would rank as Citigroup’s largest shareholder ahead of Los Angeles-based Capital Group Cos. and Saudi billionaire Prince Alwaleed bin Talal, data compiled by Bloomberg show.

As Resident Bush continues to tell us the economy couldn’t possibly, in any way, be better, and that in fact American money will henceforth fly out of our ATMs accompanied by flowers and candy, here’s further evidence that he’s right. The Bush economy is doing very well. Foreigners love it!

From Bloomberg

Nov. 27 (Bloomberg) — Citigroup Inc., the biggest U.S. bank by assets, will receive a $7.5 billion cash infusion from Abu Dhabi to replenish capital after record mortgage losses wiped out almost half its market value.

Citigroup rose 2.6 percent in New York trading today following acting Chief Executive Officer Win Bischoff’s statement late yesterday that funds from the state-owned Abu Dhabi Investment Authority will help “strengthen our capital base.”

Abu Dhabi will buy securities that convert to stock and yield 11 percent a year, almost double the interest Citigroup offers bond investors, underscoring the New York-based company’s need for cash. Fourth-quarter profit will be reduced by as much as $7 billion because of losses from subprime mortgages, which led to the departure of CEO Charles O. “Chuck” Prince III and a 46 percent slump in its stock this year.

“Clearly, Citi has a problem with capital adequacy after the subprime crisis,” said Giyas Gokkent, head of research at National Bank of Abu Dhabi PJSC, Abu Dhabi’s biggest bank by market value. “ADIA has seen an opportunity to get cheaply into a blue-chip stock.”

With the purchase of a 4.9 percent stake, Abu Dhabi, the largest emirate in the United Arab Emirates and its capital, would rank as Citigroup’s largest shareholder ahead of Los Angeles-based Capital Group Cos. and Saudi billionaire Prince Alwaleed bin Talal, data compiled by Bloomberg show.

I’m too busy nursing an upset stomach from too much turkey, mashed potatoes, sweet potato, greens, fruit tort, and ham – and too busy preparing to spend money I don’t have on whatever this week’s commercials convinced me I need to buy tomorrow – to post a Thanksgiving message. So, I thought I’d let one of America’s most crotchety novelists, William S. Burroughs, say it for me:

Happy Thanksgiving!

With all the talk about unsafe amounts of lead in Chinese-manufactured children’s toys, toothpaste, etc., nobody ever mentions the positives. For instance, there is some evidence that lead-lined diapers can, on rare occasion, bestow superhuman breakdancing ability.